Still Searching for Direction

So I’ve moved out to Colorado Springs for a job that I’m finding isn’t really what I was expecting. I’m involved in environmental advocacy which is a GREAT thing to be involved with, however it’s difficult canvassing and putting in nearly 80 hours of work each week. I’ve only been here for about a week and I’m already feeling bogged down and worn out. Moving back to the Springs, I feel like I’m in a completely different place. I’ve transformed into a different person and this place hasn’t. I’m more progressive and liberal than the city. The truth is, I haven’t really interacted with the Springs since high school. Obviously, I’ve returned periodically for breaks during school but I was never really actively engaged in the politics or the overall feel of the city. I feel frustrated! I feel as though I’ve come to another pathway that isn’t necessarily the one I should be following. I want to move to move to Denver or Fort Collins. Denver primarily because it’s a bustling city and it’s the primary access point to hiking, camping, skiing, and it’s close to my friends in Fort Collins. On the other hand, Fort Collins is a town that fits my personality. It’s laid back and chill. It’s environmentally conscious and outdoor oriented. The younger mentality of the college town just screams innovation and creativity. I definitely need innovation and creativity in my life. I wanna do something that matters.

On a side note, I spent the weekend up in Fort Collins with Raine, Carina, and Megan and had a blast! I always love reconnecting with Raine and I feel as though I’m becoming closer to Carina and Megan. As Raine said, we can be “real” friends now. It’s nice to look forward to something constant. A dear friend of mine once said that as voids open up, the universe longs to fill to it. My void was the absence of my friends back in Spokane. Most especially my cherished friend Amy. Amy was my person the last 6 months or so. She made leaving Spokane so difficult by making my final days so meaningful.