LOVE My Weekend

What a weekend! Whew…Now that I feel like I have a moment to breathe. This weekend has really flown by. I got my paper and presentation done and I’m going into this final week of school with great anticipation. I can’t wait to finish classes and have nothing left but a few weeks of down time before the start of another grueling semester. After this week, I’ll be one semester closer to accomplishing my career objectives. It’s about 40 minutes before my first class of the week and I wanted to take some time to refocus.

Last night was pretty intense. I had a blow out with a friend from work and after an entire shift and several conversations, we finally worked things out. The biggest problem was the miscommunication and misperception from our respective viewpoints. I overreacted about my friend running her mouth and she didn’t really understand that some of the things she was saying in front of others were things I really didn’t want shared with our other friends. We hashed it out and I think things will be fine now. I also found contraband on my unit and it really frustrated me because things aren’t supposed to happen on my watch. While performing room safety checks, I found things that the kids were definitely NOT supposed to have. Needless to say, I tore the room apart and confiscated everything they should not have had. I passed on the information to the next following shifts and we’ll be cracking down so tight, I doubt this group of kids will try anything else while they’re on the unit. I don’t think they understand how vital their safety is to the staff.

This weekend was a great time to catch up with friends I haven’t spoken to in a while. I called Steph and we talked about whether or not we’re going on the January cruise. I’m still not completely sure I’ll be going this year. I still have a bitter taste from the fiasco in Breckenridge and I’m not really drawn to the drama that I’m sure will ensue. Christine and I spoke about school and whether or not we’ll be able to see each other this fall. We also talked about the plethora of engagements and weddings that suddenly just happened! Maybe there’s something in the air but I don’t even plan to think about anything like that until I’ve finished my grad program. I’ve heard too many horror stories to put a significant other or a family through in regards to working full time and going to school. I also got to see Raine who was abroad in Europe for what seems like an eternity. She was in the Springs and it was really good to see her.

This week, I’ll clamp down and focus solely on school then get back to the gym and start accomplishing some of the goals set forth in my last post. I wish I’d be able to get away and visit the parents who have moved to San Antonio, Texas but work won’t let me take some time. It’s probably for the best. I need to work on paying OFF bills rather than create new ones. Another goal I have for the end of this year is to completely pay off my credit card bills and start saving for grad school. Ideally, the Navy will pay for my grad degree but it’s always nice to have a backup plan. I hope everyone reading this has a fabulous week and I plan to post at least twice or three times a week from now on.

I got my swim trunks and my flippy floppies...

Can you believe the end of July is already upon us? This year has flown by and it seems like it’s breezing by at a thousand miles per hour. Looking back at my accomplishments, experiences and the memories I’ve made, I can’t help but wonder what’s going on. Next month will mark the end of my first year of employment at the hospital working with my kids. Even after a full year of service, it feels like I’ve just started. Kids come and go and sometimes even return three or four times. Maybe it’s my nature to wander but I’m ready for something new. I want more from life and I don’t feel like I’ve found that creative avenue to share my gifts and talents with the world. The feeling of failure looms in the air when I see my kiddos return even more fucked up than the last time I saw them. I guess I can’t save all of them. My line of work just doesn’t seem that meaningful and significant anymore and it’s too bad I can’t keep this notion at bay anymore.

My summer session ends next week and I’m proud to announce that I’m on track to finish my biology course with a mid to high B. Next semester it’s Human Anatomy and Physiology I and Chemistry I. The more I contemplate my future, the more impatient I become. I want to get into the gist of it all and begin my graduate program. I want to begin my career and I WANT TO HELP OTHERS! For those of you I haven’t already spoken to, I’m going to finish my prerequisites, get into a PA program, and join the Navy serving for a minimum of three years on one of the Navy’s floating hospitals. Serving on the USNS Comfort or USNS Mercy, I’ll be providing care for US combat forces deployed in oversees operations while providing medical services to support disaster relief and humanitarian operations worldwide. I don’t think anything could be more perfect; sailing around the world serving others.

A quick update on my dancing, I had the performance I mentioned in my last post. It wasn’t really what I was expecting but I learned everything in life takes flexibility. The performance was for the Pikes Peak Library District and ended up being more of a workshop than an actual performance. I intend to continue taking dance because it’s such a fun and effortless way to stay active. I doubt I’ll continue trying to book performances. My choreographer keeps pushing me to get serious and try and pursue dancing as a career but I really don’t find the life of a dancer/performer all that appealing. It just seems too fickle and fake for me. I’m not the one to easily or readily conform to the wishes and expectations of others, especially when it’s something that’s not authentic to who I am.

In danger of falling back into stagnation, it’s time I reevaluate my goals and maybe renew some of the commitments I’ve made but failed to live up to. It’s time to get back into an active routine. That means hitting the gym more often and taking advantage of the beautiful state I live in. I’d like to hike at least 5 14ers by the end of this season. With one of my best friends back from Europe, we’re gonna definitely hit up Pikes Peak again. I need to stop sleeping so much and start being more productive and efficient at managing my time. I want to be more spontaneous and do things I really enjoy doing. This Thursday, I skipped my first class of the summer and went to Six Flags with a friend. It was absolutely amazing! We got drunk and rode rollercoasters. We passed out at the water park and I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun being ridiculous. I need to back at being so good at keeping in touch with people. One of the things I heard on a regular basis when I was in Washington was that I’m so good at making time for my friends. It’s time I start living up to that.